The following article was written by Ms Afiefah Osman, an Ecumenical Accompanier from Pietermaritzburg who recently returned from Palestine and Israel.

Having spent ten weeks living on the West Bank and in Hebron, it is very hard to remain neutral. The pain, humiliation and difficulties faced by Palestinians on a daily basis cuts deep, even into the toughest of individuals. The antagonists in this drama are the Settlers. Settlers often become a curiosity as their convictions and actions often defy any rational benchmark, and the justifications for their actions are beyond comprehension. From a moral, decent and normal perspective, there is very little to endear you to the Settler cause. Having said that, I have also come to realise that it is important to distinguish between Settlers and Israelis. However, given the support of the Settlers by the Government of Israel, representation of the Israeli nation is thereby vested in supporting Settlers and their actions.

To most Ecumenical Accompaniers, the fascination with trying understand the Settler mentality often manifests itself in the desire to engage with these ideological and political curiosities. Given the hostility non-violent international volunteers encounter from Settlers, the possibilities of such engagements are limited due to risk to individuals, as many of the Settlers are intolerant of any ideologies which differ to those held by them. I experienced my own humiliations based on some deluded sense that my faith and, by default, I posed a security risk -- which amused me given my size and non-violent principles. I had very little desire to subject myself to further humiliations, and to be honest had absolutely no desire to meet a Settler. As often with life, you find yourself subject to cosmic amusements beyond your control.

Having wanted to get away from the Occupation, a luxury I was allowed by virtue of being an international, I found myself in Eilat, often described as the holiday Mecca of Israelis. To be honest, the commercial and rather fickle nature of most sea resorts is exactly what I was looking for - as well as the added attraction of being able to dive with dolphins. On my way back, I found myself seated next to a redheaded girl who looked about 16 years old with blaring music emanating from her headphones, which were clamped over her ears. As is practice in this part of the world, nobody really makes small talk, and you generally go about living your own life. There is never that 2-minute conversation in the supermarket queue or general whines about this and that. I was therefore quite surprised when this young girl looked at me, smiled and asked if I was from India. This was a question to which I was becoming quite accustomed; it would normally be followed by the raised eyebrow reaction on hearing of my South African nationality. Given the frequency of this reaction from all sides of the political spectrum, my intolerance of this error based on some social stereotypes was waning, and so I smiled.

She was curious to know what I was doing in Israel. You learn in this type of environment to speak to your audience without lying, but in well chosen, vague comments that complete any picture that is being mentally created by the receiver of this message. Satisfied with my answer of being a volunteer experiencing the culture and people, I decided to engage with this unusually friendly girl who informed me in a very American accent that she was nineteen years old. When I asked if she lived in Tel Aviv, she promptly replied that she in fact lived on the West Bank. O my Goodness!! I was sitting and having a conversation with a Settler. For once in my life, the mental workings of my mind did not reflect themselves in my facial expressions.

Cool as a cucumber, we discussed her career choices and what her plans were. She was not compelled to serve in the army being an Orthodox Jew by Faith and so her service to the country was being spent in a hospital close to her home, which was a Settlement near Qalqilia. I never remembered the name of the Settlement. I was careful not to break the flow of the conversation by reaching over to write down the name of the Settlement. This had to be casual - besides she was not fitting into my stereotype of Settlers and so where she lived seemed irrelevant to me. We talked about family, getting a gift for her sister-in-law and even ended up having something to eat at the coffee stop. We spoke about the cost of things; it had been my experience that things were cheaper in the Palestinian parts of the West Bank. Acknowledging this fact, she said her family, while living in Settlements, used to shop in Palestinian living areas but since the Intifadas, it had become too dangerous for this practice. This was based on no personal experiences, but rather government imposed restrictions for the security of the Settlers.

We spoke about the various types of practices within the Jewish faith. I mentioned my attendance of a service at a Reform Jewish synagogue, wanting to know how different it would be to her service. She was very dismissive of the Reform Jewish practices, feigning ignorance on the practices. I then explained the fact that men and woman sat together, to which she responded it would not happen at the synagogue she attended. When the dress code was brought up, she said it was not really possible to distinguish an Orthodox Jew in terms of dress from a Reformed Jew, but there was a distinction between the Orthodox and ultra orthodox. The choice of covering your hair as a married woman was also optional and what one Jewish woman chose to practice another did not. She quickly added this practice was different to the Muslims or Arabs, and here she made no distinction between the two groups, where woman were forced against their will to cover up. This amused me no end, as I had not expressed my own religious convictions to her.

I was having a nice time talking to this girl. She was rather lovely and both being single females, boys and dating was an inevitable part of our conversation. Well, she said friends and family set single girls up. There was a difference between dating habits of the Orthodox and the ultra orthodox. The ultra orthodox would have partnerships arranged by their parents. She was quick to point out it was a choice by young Jewish people to have things this way. This was different to the Arab arranged marriage practices where she believed young people were forced into relationships. Her constant need to distinguish the Jewish practices from the Arab practices amused me. I posed the scenario of what would happen if she fell in love with someone of another faith? To her this would never be a possibility as she was happy to point out that while it seemed racist to others, the need to only socialise and develop meaningful friendships with people of your own Faith was a way to preserve your lifestyle.

We chatted a little more and after wishing each other well, I had to ponder the question: what would her reaction have been had I revealed to her the Faith to which I belong? It was the same Faith she wanted to distinguish herself from and found all people belonging to that faith dangerous - and yet I think I can safely say our 3-4 hour trip was found to be rather pleasant by both us. I guess most of the fears and stereotypes are just mind games we play with ourselves and sadly these vulnerabilities allow others to control us.

I work for SACC as an Ecumenical Accompanier serving on the World Council of Churches' Ecumenical Accompaniment Programme in Palestine and Israel (EAPPI). The views contained herein are personal and do not necessarily reflect those of my employer SACC or the WCC. If you would like to publish the information contained in here or disseminate it further, please contact the EAPPI Communications Officer and Managing Editor for permission. Thank you.